“Curiosity is the wick in the candle of learning.”
William Arthur Ward
Mental Health Awareness
Public Experience
At the close of Mental Health Awareness week, it is possible to be feeling a bit overwhelmed by information overload, even though this year’s theme, about the power of nature to calm and soothe was timely and relevant. However, it is still sometimes difficult to unravel what actually works .
Personal Insight
To help, it may be useful therefore to share some new found learning. My adult son recently had a diagnosis of Inattentive Attention Deficit Disorder (ADHDi). This woke me up to my own experience. Even though I have never had a formal diagnosis, the patterns of behaviour and hurdles are obvious; I have done some genuinely dopey stuff but have also encountered some sometimes insurmountable-seeming challenges in my life and career.
Why this is relevant?
Everybody struggles with personal challenges and this is exacerbated by how we have structured our organisations and educational institutions. Living in the world we have created is hard for our evolutionary brains and requires effort to manage. Moreover, as we are all different and on a continuum of mental health, no one-size fits all. So, increasing awareness about mental health is a great step forward, but it does no harm to find out more about the tools that might enable us as individuals to thrive and meet our full potential.
What about Mindfulness?
So I thought why not give mindfulness another look? I had always believed that there was nothing less likely to help me than mindfulness and meditation, “Quiet my thoughts? Be in the moment? Sit cross-legged? erm no thank you..”
Yet advocating wellbeing interventions without sufficient knowledge is also not an option. Moreover, it requires a bit of bravery to seek help or try things out, but being stuck in the same mental bind also makes no sense.
So, duly, and with not a little trepidation, I enrolled in a local network course of six sessions of mindfulness.
The first thing I realised is that I knew far less about mindfulness than I thought.
And I know far less about me than I knew!
The Logistics
The sessions took place on Zoom. This was reassuring; you could switch the camera off if it felt more comfortable. There was no pressure to share personal information and safeguards were in place to ensure confidentiality.
Over six weeks, Tim, the wonderful course leader, took us calmly and kindly through some of the fundamental principles.
The meditation sessions, which I was dreading, soon felt very natural and comfortable. I even began to look forward to them. The 10 mins extra I managed to add into my daily routine became second nature. It was astonishing how quickly my body learned what was happening. In time, I tuned automatically into the space which allowed me to physically relax, mentally “turn down” noise and calm my scatty brain. And just witnessing my thoughts and bringing myself back to the present became habitual – after about the first 200 times!
What did I learn?
Mindfulness is the act of “paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, and nonjudgmentally.”
Rather than avoid painful thoughts, sensations, anxieties or other negative emotions, you learn to pay attention to them. You sit with, dispassionately view and recognise them, even if it is not always clear what caused them.
It was clear too that our thinking patterns might make things more difficult. To name just a few; catastrophising or black and white thinking ups the ante and causes increased personal suffering and over-ruminating or worrying about the past or future only serves to exacerbate this.
Life is complex and challenging. But our distress is often worsened because of the importance we attach to things or the pressure we put ourselves under, even when we are met with situations which are not in our control. So, through strategies like thought diffusion and present moment awareness, acceptance began to become more possible.
Moreover, staying calm and turning down the volume of painful thoughts and emotions is something you can learn.
What else?
Changing the physicality of the body can impact mental stress levels too.
So:
- Taking deeper, slower breaths or starting your breathing lower in the abdomen.
- Pausing and holding back on reacting until the emotion fades or is quietened.
- Having somebody gently push down on your shoulders, using a weighted blanket or a roller or prickle balls allows tight muscles to relax.
Gradually it became possible to calm physical responses, re-programme thinking and create the energy to deal with the challenges. And it makes sense; if you have a broken leg, you work harder at moving the muscles to rehabilitate. So dedicating time to strengthening and training the largest organ and overcoming difficulty adds up.
What will stick with me?
The longer we journey through our human condition, the clearer it is that learning something new about ourselves, our environments, and how we manage life, is time well spent.
- The only way to get over preconceptions is to give things a try; you lose nothing and you could gain much.
- There is no cure for the stresses of living, but intervening to prevent ourselves from intensifying our own suffering makes perfect sense.
- When situations get too difficult to manage, seeking appropriate professional advice and support can make all the difference to how we manage and recover.
- Yet this can take time and waiting for interventions can be really difficult, so finding what helps to keep one’s head above the water is beyond valuable.
- It is possible to meditate even if, like me, you think it’s not for you. You never know – it may change your outlook for good.
Some useful sources of advice
Getting started with Mindfulness
The Mindfulness Network – free sessions
Or contact me if you would like to know more about the research which forms the basis of my practice on Workplace Wellbeing and how I can help.